When you were dating and he ate salad with his hands, you thought it was cute. When you saw clothes strewn on the floor in his apartment, you told yourself a life of love is about a whole lot more than a few dirty clothes . . . and, were you ever correct?! It’s about a ton of dirty clothes that never stop coming!
. . . and, when you were dating and waiting . . . waiting in the car, waiting in her parent’s entry way, waiting . . . waiting . . . it was all okay because, She’s worth the wait! you told yourself.
New Faithful Life Podcast Episode – How to Get Your Spouse to Change . . .the Right Way!
Maybe it was your boyfriend who was always late, maybe it was your girlfriend who ate salad with her fingers . . . or a thousand other things. They were all so endearing back then, weren’t they – but now? The very things we told ourselves we loved in our husband/wife to be – the idiosyncrasies we found so intriguing in him/her when we first met and during the euphoria of the first weeks or months of married life are now the very things many couples find so frustrating a few months or years into marriage . . . and are determined to change!
Have you ever tried to change your husband? Have you ever attempted to manipulate your wife into doing things differently?
It’s common in marriage to try to change one’s spouse . . . after all . . . you’re just trying to help! You’re just trying to make things better! It’s here where many couples get a few important words confused: Right, Wrong, and Different. When it comes to the change we want to see in other people, we get those words mixed up all the time. The fact is, when it comes to changing another person, we’re not nearly as good at it as we think we are. And, even though some of us have made a career out of it, it’s our job.
Trying to change another person leads to strife, and taken to the extreme, disaster, in any relationship.
Is there a correct way to go about addressing things in your marriage (and other relationships) that you would like to see changed? Yes, there is!
But, how do we avoid the wrong way? How do we avoid the relational pitfalls of dealing with such a sensitive topic in important relationships, and especially in marriage? the Bible provides some deep insight and direct instruction on how to proceed. Join us on this podcast for a great discussion on How to get your spouse to change . . . the right way!
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Matt Jacobson is the founder of FaithfulMan.com a biblical marriage, parenting, and discipleship ministry providing written and audio teaching, as well as couples marriage coaching. He is the co-host (with his wife, Lisa) of Faithful Life Podcast and is author of the bestseller, 100 Ways to Love Your Wife. Matt is pastor of Tumalo Bible Fellowship and is married to Lisa, founder of Club31Women.com (they have 8 kids!).