Are you quick to listen? Are you genuinely eager to hear your spouse share what is on her heart or is your marriage just another opportunity to insist that someone else listen to what you are determined to say? What does the way we communicate say about who we really are?
We don’t have to cast about for the best way to communicate. The Bible already tells us: Be quick to listen and slow to speak. (James 1:19) To enjoy the best of what God intends for our marriage, we need the Word of God in our lives. Our communication in marriage needs to be washed with the water of the Word.
But we’re often just the opposite, aren’t we? Why is that? Why are we so quick to insist that our spouse listen to what we have to say and so slow (impatient) to hear what is on his/her mind?
It’s not really that complicated. We just don’t like the answer: Pride. Being quick to speak and slow to listen reveals a lack of humility – a lack of obedience to God’s Word. The truth is, we love the sound of our own voices and are too confident in what we think we know, determined to speak while others listen. It’s just another way of making clear to your spouse how much you love yourself.
The times strife has found it’s way into Lisa’s and my marriage have nearly all been because of being quick to speak (insisting on being listened to) and slow to listen (uninterested in or impatient to listen).
Where is your marriage communication at, these days? Are you walking with each other according to the Word or have bad, negative (sinful!) patterns become the norm in your marriage? Getting into a destructive communication pattern can be so incremental we don’t even realize what we’re doing and we become comfortable with things that have no place in a loving, godly marriage. The good news is, changing doesn’t have to be incremental. You can make a positive change right now and move on to a deeper, more loving, God-honoring relationship, today. This is the topic of today’s podcast episode. Join the conversation and ask yourself: Am I quick to listen and slow to speak? Am I walking in respect and humility with the one I love?
Do you want to build positive communication patterns in your marriage? Speaking words of Affirmation into your husbands/wife’s heart each day is a beautiful way to communicate in every marriage! These books are available right now!
We hope both of these books — 100 Words of Affirmation Your Husband Needs to Hearand 100 Words of Affirmation Your Wife Needs to Hear (sold separately, or together as a bundle!) — will encourage and inspire your own relationship with your spouse.
Our new books aren’t just theory but show how we “do” marriage. These books are, literally, a window into the relationship we have and how we walk out our marriage, day-to-day. These new books are designed to encourage and equip you in your own marriage.
Every one of us has tremendous power to either build others up or tear them down through the words we speak every day, and nowhere is this more evident than in our marriages.
Are you being purposeful in how you use the power of your words to speak encouragement, strength, and love–breathing life into the heart of your spouse? Or are careless words having a negative impact on your marriage and on the heart of the one you love most?
We want you and your spouse to discover the powerful ways you can build one another up in love with the words that you choose to say every day–words that every husband and wife need to hear. These marriage books offer you 100 Things to say to your husband or wife that deeply encourage, affirm, and inspire.
Start speaking these words into each other’s lives and watch your spouse – and your relationship – transform before your eyes! Get your copies right here – 100 Words of Affirmation Bundle
Matt Jacobson is a biblical marriage coach and founder of FaithfulMan.com a biblical marriage, parenting, and discipleship ministry providing written and audio teaching, as well as couples marriage coaching. He is the co-host (with his wife, Lisa) of Faithful Life Podcast and is author of the bestseller, 100 Ways to Love Your Wife. Matt is pastor of Tumalo Bible Fellowship and is married to Lisa, founder of Club31Women.com (they have 8 kids!).